cultural differences

I think I'm really feeling the difference between my background in the Western states and the backgrounds of many here who grew up in Illinois or the midwest.

For one thing, I find that people here often marry quite young. My immediate response to many of these young guys who show up (especially in the musicology program) married is: What are you so afraid of in life that you had to get married so young? Now I don't mean for this to be a blanket statement. G and R got married young and are crazy about each other and obviously should be together. Same goes for other people I know. But by and large, the statistics show that many marriages at a young age just don't work out. It's particularly freaky that so many of these music guys' wives are also *pregnant*. I just see a lot of mess in their futures, that's all.

In Boulder, you just don't run into a lot of young married couples. Or if you do, they seem to be getting divorces. I worked in a bridal shop in Boulder and most of the brides who came in there were well into their thirties.

I guess I'm also at a weird age. I'm mad that I don't have more dating options, to be honest. I tried very hard to be a lesbian when I was in my early 20s, started dating men when I was 27, and now that I've been through my "saturn return" and feel pretty solid in who I am, have come to terms with the fact that I've probably always been more or less straight. And now everyone's taken. Men are even more committed to their girlfriends than to their wives, interestingly.

Before the last year, men would show vague interest in me but they wouldn't wind up dating me. In the past year, I've found that men do want to date me, but then, when we've dated awhile (or sometimes not long at all), they inevitably decide that I'm not right for them. I thought for a time that perhaps they didn't think they wanted someone as strong and confident as I am. But then they almost always move on to some other woman who actually controls them. So they may not think they want a strong woman, but they certainly seem to want to be bossed around.

Grr. It's just enough to make me want to pack up and move to another planet.